Impact

Impact. The reason Chandler isn’t here with us today. Impact with a vehicle’s windshield caused irreversible, catastrophic damage to Chandler’s brain.

Impact is also what Chandler made when he was here with us. We didn’t even realize how far-reaching his impact was until we started hearing the stories from people we had never met until after the accident.

When Chandler came back from his three-month trip to India a few years ago, he had talked about starting a lungi business that would ultimately bring much-needed resources to people in India who lived in poverty.

I received a card in the mail last week from World Vision stating that a goat and two chickens were being given to a struggling family in Chandler’s name. He would have loved nothing more!

I’ve also learned that three of Chandler’s friends have become clean and sober as a direct result of Chandler’s death. I still cannot type those two words…Chandler’s death…without feeling something must be amiss. It can’t be real.

People who didn’t even know Chandler have told me that through hearing about his life, they have become more intentional about being present in the moment with the people in their lives.

A wise pastor and friend used to always say, “Life in community is messy, painful, and difficult.” Chandler did not shy away from any of that. He listened and accepted, without judgment. This is a primary reason he made such an impact in his too-short time on earth. I want to learn from his example.

I greatly admire the other parents in this shitty club who have started foundations and organizations that continue to make a positive impact in the names of their children. I’ve been pondering my role, our role as a family, in honoring Chandler by carrying on where he left off. I’m not sure at this point exactly what that looks like.

For now, I know that any act of kindness, generosity, or compassion inspired by Chandler will elicit a dimpled grin that will capture the hearts of all his new neighbors.

Today’s Chandler-ness:
11/14/99 - When people get married, they don’t do a French kiss. They just do an American kiss and make it last for a long time.