The First 10

This morning I said good-bye to my glorious, peaceful, soul-nourishing four-day spiritual retreat that God was so, so good to provide for me with no planning or obsessing on my part. Thanks to Chip for bidding in the charity silent auction on this week in Palm Desert and to God for making sure the person who actually won the bid could NOT do these dates, so it went to us!!! I can’t even count the ways God has shown up over and over and over, providing exactly what I need, when I need it. I had been thinking about going on a spiritual retreat but didn’t want to have to think about the logistics of it. This week was another of God’s gracious gifts to me.

So here’s a snapshot of my first 10 minutes after touchdown back into real life at 12 Morningstar.

I pull into the driveway, get out, and begin to unload the car. Immediately I notice our new gate. It’s a silhouette of Chandler living his life to its fullest on his bike, taken directly from one of our favorite pics of him. Chip worked with a designer and had it installed this week.

I barely begin absorbing the beauty and the painful context of this permanent reminder of my son’s life when I receive notice from Charli about something that has to be taken care of tonight before she can play soccer in Surf Cup this weekend. So I switch into soccer mom mode and start searching for the appropriate item.

But first, as I walk through the family room and into the kitchen to unpack some leftover food and the borrowed juicer (thanks Wendy!), I notice a blue ceramic lamp (that I love!) mysteriously missing from an end table. After setting down my load on the kitchen counter, I look around, knowing the lamp couldn’t possibly have just disappeared. Aha! There it is, lying on its side on the cabinet in the living room. I go to pick it up only to discover it is no longer in one piece.

Then I realize that the top of my sofa table appears somewhat empty. My plant!!! I ask Charli if that pot has gotten broken too. She says, “No, it died.”

What?!!! No, that was one of the plants that was given to us when Chandler died! I’ve been trying so hard to keep all of those alive.

My heart sinks. Charli tells me she thinks it might be outside.

I look out back on the patio table. WHEW! There it is, not looking too perky, but alive. Chip had noticed its dramatic wilting early this week and put it outside thinking it needed sun. Of course, he couldn’t know that it is just an incredibly thirsty plant that only wants a big drink of water.

On top of all this….I met my friend this afternoon for tea. Let me just say, the earl grey lavender at Harmony Tea House is delicious, but it DOES have caffeine. So everything I experienced within the first 10 minutes of touchdown back home was encountered UNDER THE INFLUENCE! I was jittery, hyper, and kicking myself for not choosing a tea that wouldn’t make me feel like Hammy on Over the Hedge.

Despite the 10-minute rollercoaster upon touchdown, it’s good to be home.

I’m grateful for my family. For a lamp that can be fixed. For a plant that can be revived. For a soccer game that can be played.

And for a beautiful life that can be remembered.